Here is the piece I wrote at the request of Huffington Post. They wanted to know more about why the Plumfund had been created. If they like it, I think they'll be publishing it. I could also be invited to blog for them a couple times a month. I hope they offer me a blogger position. It could be just the exposure and platform I need to promote the various causes I want to bring to people's attention. Besides the business about life insurance policies, I plan to support organ donation, CHD and HLHS awareness, the Ronald McDonald House foundation (#rmhfamilyforever), Make-A-Wish, and medical research around transplants and stem cell treatments.
Let me just start by saying how
much I dislike asking people for money. I grew up poor and always prided myself
in my work ethic and ability to provide for myself and break the cycle of
poverty. From the moment we found out about Sebastian’s Hypoplastic Left Heart
Syndrome diagnosis at 19 weeks along, friends and family wanted to know how
they could help. Sure we had fundraisers and such, but even when we were sent
to Stanford unexpectedly in November of 2012, where we remained for a year
waiting for a heart transplant (and eventually had a risky open heart surgery
to prolong the inevitable), I never once started a crowdfunding site. Nor did
I, when once again my baby took a sudden turn for the worse shortly after his 4th
birthday, and we were life flighted down to Stanford to await transplant once
more. So why a Plumfund now?
Well, my worst nightmare came true!
My amazing, smart, and funny heart warrior lost his battle on July 20th.
Sebastian loved life and was loved by so many in his short 4 years! He fought
hard and overcame so many odds that no matter what, we thought he was going to
make it. His story always amazed and inspired all who heard it. So his death
shocked all of us. Adding to the blow came the cost of burial. Having to pay
not one, but two, mortuaries and transportation to get him back home to Oregon
from California and laid to rest in just the right spot, was more than I could
have imagined. But of course, being the responsible person I am, I had a life
insurance policy to cover it all right!? WRONG! I am responsible. I did have a
policy for Sebastian at one point. I did not have one when he died.
Shortly after Sebastian was born,
Gerber sent me (like they do all new parents) a packet of information on buying
life insurance policies. I knew the road ahead was going to be hard and the
odds were stacked against my beautiful baby boy, who had just undergone his
first of three major open heart surgeries at three weeks old and come back to
us after his heart stopped just an hour post-op (something the surgeon told us
was “a miracle”). So like I mentioned, being that responsible person that I am,
I contacted Gerber about buying a policy. I was saddened to find out that
because of my Miracle Monkey’s congenital heart defect (CHD) they would not sell
me any kind of coverage for him. I called other life insurance companies and
got the same response; they don’t cover children born with CHDs. Fast forward
two years and I was back to teaching public school full-time. Part of my
benefits package included the chance to buy a life insurance policy for
dependents. Naturally, I was excited because they couldn’t exclude him. I paid
on the policy for almost two years, but during Spring Break we got the news
that his heart function was decreasing and that he would need more surgeries or
a transplant soon. I left my job to take care of him. By Mother’s Day he was in
heart failure and within a week we were back at Stanford waiting for heart
transplant. Since I had to leave my job, I lost my benefits, including the life
insurance policy.
The day Sebastian left us, another
heart mom asked if she could start a Plumfund to help with the cost of his
memorial. Faced with something a parent should never have to do: bury their
young child; I said “okay”. No parent should have to take out credit cards and
put their house on the market to cover funeral expenses because they were
denied a life insurance policy they were willing to pay for. My new mission is
to bring awareness to, and hopefully an end of CHD and other childhood illness
exclusions by life insurance companies.
With help from many loved ones, Sebastian
was laid to rest after a perfect service. His presence was felt in the train
whistle that blew in the distance as we put his favorite Thomas the Train
engines on his casket. And when he shined a ray of light down on us as the
balloons released by all the children in attendance floated up into the vast
blue sky. I thank everyone who was involved in helping honor his sweet spirit
and I send blessings to those who have said prayers or words of comfort, shared
his Plumfund, or donated to his memorial.
